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“We’re very fortunate to be building something together where we have the same goals, passions, and dreams and that we’re able to communicate on a daily basis.”鈥� her co-founder and husband, .

Like my husband , and me, the Hartzes are committed to one another in business and marriage. I鈥檓 the CEO of , Josh is the CTO, and together we run a venture-backed company and global team from our San Francisco apartment.

Our situation is not entirely unique. Consider the couple and 鈥攖hey co-founded and led the company together for over a decade. And and , who launched and later closed in a sale of the company to .

In many ways, we鈥檙e no different from nonmarried business partners, whether it be 鈥檚 and or 鈥檚 and Evan Williams, other duos who鈥檝e experienced the compelling connection forged in co-founding鈥攁 relationship that can present as many challenges as finding a fitting romantic partner.

Some background

My husband鈥檚 and my journey almost never began. In 2016, I came across Josh鈥檚 profile on a dating app. I鈥檇 never tried online dating and was feeling skeptical so much so that I didn’t give his profile a second glance. The hat he wore in his profile photo didn鈥檛 help.

Thankfully, the app allowed me to review details of past potential suitors, including things Josh had highlighted in my profile鈥攖hings he liked. I decided to give him a shot. I was attracted to his smile and discovered we shared a love of technology. At the time, I was a senior product manager at and he was a lead engineer at .

We met for dinner at a restaurant on Haight Street in San Francisco and ended up talking for hours, stopping only because the place was closing for the night. We married on May 18, 2018.

Sometimes you just know you鈥檝e discovered something right. Our experience with CodeSee followed a similar path, becoming full-time co-founders and lead executives of our company in September 2020.

Spouses and startups can co-exist beautifully, as long as the partners take steps to minimize complications and maximize the health of their personal and professional relationships. Many of the lessons we鈥檝e learned as married co-founders apply to all close business relationships.

Some guidance

• Divide and conquer. At the outset, establish the specific areas of responsibilities between you. This avoids role confusion and disputes. In our case, I define how we build the business and product, but Josh has the final say on software engineering matters. We each voice opinions, but it鈥檚 clear where the line is drawn.
• Beware of spillover between home and work. It can be challenging delineating a husband-wife conversation from a CTO-CEO discussion. A heated business conversation can start to feel personal鈥攅specially when you step into it in off hours. It鈥檚 helpful to preemptively set expectations for topics of discussion and schedule time to connect the bounds of work.
• Protect work-life equilibrium. Starting a company in tandem requires careful balance. We love our company, but also realize the risks associated with failing to find time for each other. And no matter your co-founding relationship dynamic, we all require the space to be human. This can look like a shared attendance to working hours. Respect your downtime.
• Focus on communication. Having open lines of communication between company stakeholders is necessary to ensure expectations are aligned. While Josh and I communicate well, going into business together upped the ante. We took an intentional approach to meeting the challenge, reading, 鈥�,鈥� and implementing the best practices in conversation recommended by the authors. We鈥檝e become even better at recognizing each other鈥檚 needs, and appreciating the critical qualities of trust and vulnerability in both sides of our relationship.

鈥淎 successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person,鈥� said author .

Arguably, this sentiment holds true beyond the author鈥檚 intention, extending to describe the relationships between successful co-founders. When you launch a company with another and collaborate to see it thrive, you’re not just building a business, you鈥檙e building a bond.

听 is co-founder and CEO of , a听developer platform that helps developers and development teams better understand codebases.

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